Your Writing Mentor

Mary Knippel

My job as a woman in business…

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It’s Business Women’s Day and I want to celebrate you…celebrate us! I realize that being a woman in business can be hard what with wearing all those hats and juggling all those expectations.

Sometimes we struggle with wondering what to say, and we think…that just doesn’t make any sense, or how in the world does an ordinary person like me find the words to write quality content on my blog?

Well, I’ll tell you a little secret.

I’m using my words right now and sharing quality content (I hope you think it’s quality content). My writing style is conversational – just like my speaking style. By writing about something that has been a challenge for you and offering a suggestion which may be the solution to your dilemma, I am providing quality content. 

That’s my job as Your Writing Mentor.

What I think happens to so many entrepreneurs is that they are overwhelmed by all the details of their business. 

Do you feel you have to wear roller skates to keep up?

Writing is a necessary and vital component of your business, but somewhere in the past you may have been told that you couldn’t write. So now, you are hesitant, reluctant, or even afraid of writing.

That breaks my heart because I know you have a lot to say.

You have a passion and are an expert at what you do. That’s your job. 

Writing about your business is you sharing your passion with readers in order to help them understand why you are doing what you do and to help them feel the way you feel. It is not rocket science. I believe everyone has a message to share. Sometimes it takes a little guidance for the words to come. Speaking from your heart allows you to capture the words…the authentic words…your readers are longing to hear. And when they hear them, they will recognize you as the solution they are seeking.

Okay,  I hear you thinking…”that’s easy for you to say,” I can energetically feel your resistance.

But think about this…what if because you expressed yourself, your thoughts and dreams, your challenges and solutions…someone else felt heard, you validated their thoughts, they felt someone else understood them, and as a consequence, they didn’t feel so alone.

What if you made a difference in someone else’s life because you expressed your thoughts?

Regardless of what has happened in the past, you are a successful business owner who is in charge of all the elements of your business…including writing!

No really, you are already an author. Now, it is a matter of moving the words from your head to the screen/paper and sharing them with your readers.

As far as the content goes, you already have that in your head because just about anything that interests you will interest the people who are looking to connect with you. Yes, that’s right…talk about- 

  • how your first job was such a disaster and the lessons it taught you 
  • how proud you are of the Little League team you sponsor
  • the yoga retreat or the trip you took to wine country (it’s important to have downtime and get recharged)
  • the fundraiser for your child’s school (volunteering is an important part of your life)
  • what is going on in your industry

…in other words, talk about your life and your business.

That’s my job to be your cheerleader, architect and nudge. To help you discover the story the world is waiting to hear from you. To be your champion and cheerleader by reminding you that no one else can share your message from your perspective. And to help you build the structure of your message so that it is received by those waiting to hear it. Also, to keep you on track by reminding you of the dream to make a difference and enthusiastically encouraging you to keep writing!

Photo credit:  Dreamstime.com

 

 

 

 

Celebrate World Gratitude Day

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A French proverb tells us that “Gratitude is the heart’s memory.”  Sarah Ban Breathnach

I am grateful for the first person who ever honestly, inexplicably and amazingly believed in my talent/gift/ability to write. How did she know? I am convinced she knew because she saw inside my soul. “I can’t wait to read your book,” she had said to me.  Her tone held encouragement, admiration and confidence.  She spoke with such faith of my dreams as reality and a foregone conclusion.

It was the end of October 1983. My father had just passed away and I was on a personal retreat at a small convent. There was a communal kitchen with huge loaves of brown bread and enormous jars of peanut butter, a six-slice toaster and refrigerator with a few apples and the pint of Half & Half I’d brought for my tea. On the other side of the room opposite the Formica table and eight chairs was a saggy dark green couch with a striped orange and brown afghan adorning the back cushions. The blanket, no doubt, was a donation from the Ladies Circle.  The best part about the sofa was that is was positioned in front of a large brick fireplace with an ample supply of wood.

I sat on one end of the couch watching the flames dance up the chimney. She sat on the other end; her plump sausage fingers buried in a wootle of baby blue yarn while the long silver knitting needles fenced at her direction. Her Clairol enhanced hair was pulled into a loose bun on the top of her head. She had a yellow No. 2 pencil stuck in it, a habit she’d picked up from work. I can still see her bent down and digging in a brown grocery bag looking for a ball of bright blue yarn to introduce to the dance her fingers were choreographing.

 I exchanged a pleasant hello, but turned to stare into the flames and hoped I wouldn’t have to start a conversation. She chatted without provocation about her life, only pausing once in a while to allow me to answer a cursory amount. I told her more than I’d realized when I left to go. She was a cook at Woolworth’s lunch counter she told me and this was her annual vacation from her husband and five children.  Usually, she was at work in her white shoes and apron with black polyester dress at 7 am Monday thru Friday and 5 am on Sat and Sunday. But it was her birthday and she was treating herself. She talked about baking apple pies because this was apple harvest time. I said my favorite and dads was the French Apple my mother made. But I didn’t know when she’d feel like making it since he was gone. I talked about how I was going to school and would graduate next June. How we were on a waiting list for a baby. How I wanted to be a writer. How I longed to write something people would want to read. And she kept knitting and listening.

I got up to go to my room, my cell really; collect my PJ’s and head down the hall to the shared bathroom to take a long soak accompanied by a good cry. She looked up from her half-finished scarf and fixed her tender dark brown eyes on me and her words washed over me, “I’m looking forward to reading your book.” I have to honor that faith!

Yes, You Can write and you are a Writer!

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Embracing these magic words change your life. The validation of that statement is enormous. Now, change the pronoun from “you” to “I” and say “I can write and I am a writer” out loud. Did you smile and nod in satisfaction? Did you get a gut-wrenching feeling in your stomach? Or, did you choke and not even utter the words? Although we may Reluctant Writers who choose never to share our writing with the world, we are all writers.

When I was the Humor Editor for the Adams Tiger Tales, I modeled my writing after Erma Bombeck, a favorite humor columnist. She combined wit and wisdom and bridged the generation gap so that parents and teens identified with her material. I never realized until sitting down to write this essay how much I had in common with her. During college, our guidance counselors encouraged us to forget about journalism and pursue a secretarial career. When you are a writer, one of the things you need is some encouragement. Having your guidance counselor tell you to look for another line of work is not a vote of confidence. But, Erma and I found encouragement from caring professors who recognized our talents and gave us what we needed to continue writing. They said those magic words: “you can write.”

The really hard part is allowing ourselves to believe those magic words in the first person. “I can write” is difficult to say for many of us because when we admit we believe it, then we start trying to justify what we have to say and who would want to read what we write. Those are sticky and tricky questions. So instead, we procrastinate and maybe even throw in the towel altogether. There are so many other pressing matters to attend to than writing: picking up the dry cleaning, dusting the guest bedroom, weeding the garden (wait, what month are we in?), you get the picture.

I’d like to offer the suggestion to consider the phrase “I can write and I am a writer,” as a declarative statement and an exciting beginning on your path as a writer. Remember, no one else on earth can report on your unique perspective from your point of view. Write about what you know, share stories about your life, your passions, your hobbies, the last book you read, your pet peeves, why you love Lima beans, and your place in the world. The Internet makes it incredibly easy to be “published.” Everyone has a story to tell. I hope today is the day you decide you are no longer a Reluctant Writer. You have a story to tell and we all know “Yes, you Can write and you are a Writer.”

[Friday Five-Minute Writing Prompt] This is so confusing…

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This is so confusing…

Take out a fresh sheet of paper. Natalie Goldberg uses a “fast-writing” pen. I suggest using your favorite writing instrument and an unlined piece of colored paper for fun. I use a fountain pen with purple ink. Some folks opt to use a computer. Please remember that typing puts you in another part of your brain. I believe you have greater access to messages from your soul with the pen to paper. However, if you are not physically able to write, then just open a new word document on your computer and go for it. The point is to keep your fingers moving for five minutes and not stop. I want you to experience how much writing can be accomplished in a short period.

If you get stuck, just repeat the writing prompt – This is so confusion... or any other phrase that is comfortable for you. Do not stop to edit, correct spelling, look up a better word, or rearrange a sentence. Do not question what comes up in the five minutes: this doesn’t make sense, where did that come from, or what a crazy notion. This is a timed writing exercise so be sure to set the timer on your watch, phone, microwave, computer, or kitchen stove. Whether you use an egg timer, a No. 2 pencil and a spiral notebook, your iPad, or even your iPhone, the theory is the same. Keep your hand and fingers moving and have fun taking dictation from your unconscious self. Make a list, hum a tune, write a poem, or create a short, short story. This is your time to explore and experiment.

Photo credit: jamienease.com

Friends…Season…Reason…Lifetime!

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“Ya gotta have friends,” Bette Midler singing those lyrics came to mind when I noted that September is Women’s Friendship Month. Without your friends you wouldn’t be who you are today…even the friends who are no longer your friends.

Friends are the family you choose…they accept you…encourage you…hold you accountable…and celebrate you!

Study after study found in Psychology Today repeatedly stressed the impact of having friends have on our lives. While we may have many acquaintance and casual friends, true friendships, which have weathered the test of time, and witnessed everything from bad haircuts, inappropriate wardrobe choices, horrible bosses, to unhappy love affairs, really matter to your long-term well being.

Friends come into your life perhaps for a season (are you still in touch for your college classmates?); for a particular reason (remember your next-door neighbor when you bought you first home); or for an entire lifetime (you know who these special people are). They give you vital life skills by sharpening your mind, contributing to your happiness quotient, knowing yourself better, becoming inspired to reach your goals, and living a longer and healthier life.

Friends…

-don’t judge and never leave you alone…when you are silent, they sit beside you and start talking. They would not let you be sad and demoralized.

-solve each other’s problems…they listen to you when you are in a bad situation because they know that in their difficult times you would make yourself available for them as they have done for you.

-motivate you to achieve your goal in life and they’ll even help you in achieving that goal.

-give you a reality check because they are able to see things that we can’t, and aren’t afraid to share their dose of reality with you.

-with friends, you can effect social change. It’s difficult, if not impossible, to fight for a cause, raise money for charity, or even just make a few small improvements in your community on your own. Friends are the first step.

-giving the gift of being influential can be one of the greatest joys you pass on to your friends.

Friends matter to you and because they matter to you, you matter to them…you need friends and they need you.

By the way, this picture is of my dear friend Cindy and I after one of our Creativity adventures. We bonded at what we lovingly refer to as “the worst writing workshop” we have ever attended. I’m happy to report that the best thing to come out of the workshop is our lasting friendship!