Hi,

January 25, 2012 By 2 Comments

 The Unleashed Homemakertm

create your own happily ever after…

Does the question “Now What?” echo as a vague whisper or a loud demand?  Have you spent your whole life taking care of others and now look up to discover your family has grown up, your marital status has changed, or you are experiencing health problems? Perhaps your children have grown, or your job has been reorganized.

Do you feel

  • invisible?

  • disconnected?

  • voiceless?

I know how you feel and I founded The Unleashed Homemakertm to help you along the journey from the woman you no longer recognize to the woman you want to become.

One of the goals I am no longer putting off is writing my book. I am the author of The Secret Artist, give yourself permission to let your creativity shine ! Tapping into our creativity has amazing power and I look forward to introducing you to so many fun things we can do to get in touch with our creativity.

I also realize the name homemaker brings up all sorts of thoughts and I’ll let you in a little secret – we are all  homemakers whether we create a home environment for a family unit, or practice self-care to nurture our bodies which is the “home” we all dwell in.

I have had two breast cancer diagnosis,  I am passionate about encouraging everyone not to wait until they have a health crisis to UNLEASH and take care of themselves.

You too can  create your own happily ever after. 


Filed Under: communications, copywriting, General, Memoir, nonfiction writing, Personal, Productivity, Speaking, story, Workshop, Writing Tagged With: , , , , , ,

In my wildest dreams…

May 18, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Friday five-minute writing prompt - In my wildest dreams…Last night, last week, last year, or something you’ve only fantasized about.

Take out a fresh sheet of paper. Natalie Goldberg uses a “fast-writing” pen. I suggest using your favorite writing instrument and an unlined piece of colored paper for fun. I use a fountain pen with purple ink. Some folks opt to use their computer. If that is your preferred method to write, then just open a new word document on your computer and go for it. The point is to keep your fingers moving for five minutes and not stop. I want you to experience how much writing can be accomplished in a short period of time.

If you get stuck, just repeat the writing prompt – In my wildest dreams…

 or any other phrase that is comfortable for you. Do not stop to edit, correct spelling, look up a better word, or rearrange a sentence. Do not question what comes up in the five minutes:  this doesn’t make sense, where did that come from, or what a crazy notion. This is a timed writing exercise so be sure to set the timer on your watch, phone, microwave, computer, or kitchen stove. Whether you use an egg timer, a No. 2 pencil and spiral notebook, your iPad, or even your iPhone, the theory is the same. Keep your hand and/or fingers moving and have fun taking dictation from your unconscious self. Make a list, write a poem, or create a short, short story. This is your time to explore and experiment.

 

Filed Under: Creativity, General, nonfiction writing, story, Stress, Writing Tagged With: , , , ,

Still breathing

May 16, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Have you ever felt so overwhelmed you literally could not breathe?

Times like that where it is fight or flight, which do you do?

Do you dig your heals in and say bring it on…

Or, do you swallow your tears, resign yourself to having no options and go numb?

I know what that feels like. 

I know what both sides feel like. 

I was rear-ended in a car accident and experienced one long headache for almost a year and a half after the  accident. Yes, the incident was a pain, but that’s not the ache I’m referring to. I literally had a headache that never went away no matter how many Advil I took or long baths I soaked in. I received some relief from neck massage and finally made the connection that my headaches were from the fact I was still reliving the impact of the car accident every day. I was holding my breath and tensing up my shoulders as my bumper crumpled in and accordion fold into the trunk of my car.

When I made the connection of the pain in my head and the story I kept reliving, I was able to seek a way to find a solution to my headaches.

I was not responsible for the accident. But I am responsible for changing the story I am living so that I can move past what caused the pain in the first place.

You can too.

Breathe!

Sound too simple? Perhaps, but give it at try. Stop what you are doing and fill your lungs. Now breathe out slowly. Do that for five more breaths. What do you feel? Maybe not a significant difference. Maybe you will even say nothing’s different.

It works for a lot of people not just me; I’m not the first person with this little bit of simple wisdom.

Fight or flight is a choice we face every day in a hundred different ways. Tapping into my creativity, writing in my journal, seeking simple stress management techniques (soaking in a bubble bath, getting a massage, attending a Yoga class) to I manage my survival instincts.

I’m still breathing.

How do you keep breathing?

 


Filed Under: copywriting, General, nonfiction writing, story, Stress, Writing Tagged With: , , , , ,

Take time for an Internal Audit

May 15, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Hearing the word audit my thoughts turn to the April 15 deadline and the number crunching for the Internal Revenue Service. No, the Internal Audit I’m asking you to consider is all about the resources we deplete to the state of exhaustion and have such a difficult time replenishing. Don’t know what I’m talking about?

Do you ever skip breakfast and substitute a giant cup of coffee or tea, along with a bagel or jelly doughnut?

Do you ever grab a candy bar for lunch? Do you ever skip lunch and inhale the contents of your refrigerator standing up when you get home from work?

Do you ever feel as if you could sleep the entire weekend because you are exhausted from the stress of the week?

Now do you have an image of the “resources” I’m talking about? The Internal Audit I’d like you to conduct involves a notebook, a pen, and you sitting quietly for 15 minutes to answer the question: How do I build up my resources? Or, what is my plan to nurture myself to avoid depleting my valuable internal resources?

Make a plan right now to decide what you will do when faced with life’s challenges – because we all know that despite our best plans, sometimes we have to go to Plan B or just punt – so figure out what you want to do BEFORE facing those challenges.

1.  Have a quick breakfast option handy for those get-out-the-door-fast days such as a baggie of mixed nuts, or  protein shake/bar.

2.  Make your lunch for the next day while you are putting away dinner leftovers and in the morning all you have to do is grab and go.  

3.  Choose one night a week to go to bed at 9 p.m. Soak in the tub, read a book for pleasure, or catch up those magazines that have been piling up.

Filed Under: Coaxing Creativity Tues Tip, Creativity, General, story, Stress, Writing Tagged With: , , , , , ,

If I told you the truth, you wouldn’t believe me

May 14, 2012 By 2 Comments

I’m not who you think I am.

I am more than the sum of my identities:  wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend, and volunteer. I am a problem solver, an investigator, compassionate communicator,  keen observer and a creative individual..

Above all, I am a writer. 

If I told you I only recently had the courage to describe myself with that definitive label, would you be surprised? Some of you would be because I talk about the important role writing plays in my life all the time. No one can utter the words, “Oh, I’m not a writer,” in my presence without a little friendly banter from me. It must seem ridiculous for someone who encourages others to write (to the point of accosting perfect strangers about it) to admit being uncomfortable claiming the mantle “writer”.

It is true.

I was afraid to admit the truth. It was simpler, as well as safer, to keep that part of myself hidden. Buried in my secret place where only I could access the dreams sheltered from the light. I couldn’t keep that part of me hidden because when I suppressed my writing, I suppressed myself. Have you ever felt that way?

 Writing is who I am and how I show up in the world. Writing played a critical part in my healing process from breast cancer, coping with day-to-day stress along with the biggies of moving across the country – twice – after having two jobs dissolve before our eyes.

 Why am I sharing this with you? What does the truth about me have to do with you?

 Because we are connected. While our stories may not contain the exact same details, they are similar enough. I bet you can recognize yourself in what I have shared. Just as I recognize myself in your struggles. We are all connected.

 Writing is how I connect and I would be doing you and myself a disservice if I didn’t share that gift of connection with you. Writing is my thing. Perhaps you know what your thing is…. or not. It doesn’t matter. What does matter is to share your truth and make connections. When I started writing and sharing my writing, my whole way of being in this world changed. I felt more connected not just with the world in general, but also with myself on a much deeper core level.

I encourage you to explore your conduit of connection. Tap into it. Receive the wisdom from your soul. Show up as the brilliant shining light only you can be 

 I’ve told you the truth. I invite you to tell me your truth. 

Mary

The Unleashed Homemakertm

 

P.S.  I am listening.  

 

Filed Under: communications, Creativity, General, nonfiction writing, story, Writing Tagged With: , , ,

Are my dreams bigger than my fears?

May 11, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Friday five-minute writing prompt – Are my dreams bigger than my fears?

 

Take out a fresh sheet of paper. Natalie Goldberg uses a “fast-writing” pen. I suggest using your favorite writing instrument and an unlined piece of colored paper for fun. I use a fountain pen with purple ink. Some folks opt to use their computer. If that is your preferred method to write, then just open a new word document on your computer and go for it. The point is to keep your fingers moving for five minutes and not stop. I want you to experience how much writing can be accomplished in a short period of time.

If you get stuck, just repeat the writing prompt – Are my dreams bigger than my fears?

Or any other phrase that is comfortable for you and keeps you writing. Do not stop to edit, correct spelling, look up a better word, or rearrange a sentence. Do not question what comes up in the five minutes:  this doesn’t make sense, where did that come from, or what a crazy notion. This is a timed writing exercise so be sure to set the timer on your watch, phone, microwave, computer, or kitchen stove. Whether you use an egg timer, a No. 2 pencil and spiral notebook, your iPad, or even your iPhone, the theory is the same. Keep your hand and/or fingers moving and have fun taking dictation from your unconscious self. Make a list, write a poem, or create a short, short story. This is your time to explore and experiment.

 

Filed Under: Five Minute Writing Prompt, General, nonfiction writing, Personal, Writing, Writing prompt Tagged With: , , , , , ,

I know you won’t do this for yourself

May 11, 2012 By Leave a Comment

In honor of Mother’s Day, give everyone (and yourself) a treat by spending a little time and energy figuring out how to mother yourself.

We women are champions at taking care of everyone else in our life. That’s how we show them love, I know. In the process, we deny ourselves and pretend that it doesn’t matter about us. Just as long as everyone else is well rested, we can stay up until midnight baking the cupcakes for the bake sale tomorrow. Just as long as everyone else has the latest (gadget, accessory, you fill in the blank ________), we can get by with hand-me-downs. Just as long as everyone else is happy, what we want doesn’t matter.

 Well it does matter!

 Nurturing ourselves is important and modeling that behavior for everyone else in our life shows them what matters to us.

 Make a list of what brings you joy. Then, get out your calendar, grab a highlighter, permanent marker (I don’t want you erasing these vital appointments) and block out time for you to actually do those things!

 Are you having trouble figuring out what you could do?

 Here are a few suggestions:

 1. Escape into a bubble bath - light a candle, pour yourself something sparkling to drink and sink into a scented tub

2. Have a picnic in the park – a brown bag lunch, tea and scones, or a piece of fruit and a slice of cheese – just grab a blanket or a bench and sit quietly

3.  Watch a chick-flick – an afternoon at the movies (on your couch, or my favorite, the whole darkened theatre experience with popcorn and dancing hot dogs)

 4.  Wander through a vintage clothing store, craft store, or garden center

5.  Visit a museum and do not take a guided tour- Find one exhibit/sculpture/painting that moves you and spend 15-minutes getting lost in the art

6.  Write in a journal for 15 minutes – make it fun if you are a reluctant writer – use colored paper, colored pens/pencils/crayons – be creative. This is for you…write what comes into your head and don’t worry about if it makes sense, that it should be a complete sentence, or if it looks like a random wish list. You are taking dictation from your Inner Self.

7.  Plan a mini-break just for yourself. When was the last time you went away for the weekend by yourself? Never? Well, it’s time to figure out how to make that happen. Time away from the world helps you recharge and refocus.

Just a few ideas to get you started. Your list will include the things that bring you joy and you just don’t seem to take the time to do them anymore.

I know you won’t do this for yourself, so I’m giving you permission to start today.

Give yourself and everyone else in your life the gift of a happier, healthier, more joyful YOU! Make yourself a priority by spending quality time nurturing, “mothering,” YOU!

P. S. So…. Get on with it…make the list, choose one thing you can do this week and write it on your calendar. Please share with me what you come up with. I love new ideas of places to explore and new experiences.

 

Filed Under: Creativity, General, story, Stress, Writing Tagged With: , , , , , ,

I want to be your personal mentor

May 9, 2012 By Leave a Comment

In Greek mythology, when Odysseus sailed off to Troy he left behind his precious son and entrusted Telemachus, his old friend Mentor, with the task of helping Telemachus grow up to be a wise leader, by teaching, counseling, challenging, and encouraging him.

I want to be your personal mentor, and be there encouraging, supporting, counseling, and teaching you as you go about creating your own happily ever after.

I have had some wonderful teachers, mentors and guides throughout this journey we call life. Some have taught me formally in the classroom. Some have come disguised as a chance encounter at the grocery check out line. Or, a walk on the beach where I received the magic of Nature’s nurturing. Other mentors have shown up when I had particular challenges such as the cancer diagnosis, getting voice mail that our employer has suddenly closed up shop, or coming home to find my husband at the kitchen table with realtors. My guides have helped me develop strategies, tools, and coping skills to adapt to the many surprises I have encountered. The surprises I now consider gifts.

I know the value of having someone help you identify and then champion your goals for you. Someone who will be a mirror reflecting your hopes and dreams. Someone to adjust the focus of your obstructed view to help you see the reflection of the amazing human being you are right now.

Not after losing 10 pounds.

Not after publishing the great American novel.

Not after establishing a 6-figure business.

Someone to help you open the widows on your business, or your life, to let in fresh air and blow away the myths of doubt and fear that hold you back.

There is a great potential gift when you have a surprise, life-altering experience. What comes after you crumble is that you can rise up. When you do, you may discover that your new normal is a life far more amazing.

I founded The Unleashed Homemakertm because I understand what it is like to have a life-altering experience. I know how important it is to be part of a community, to have a support system, and a mentor to help you create your new normal.

I want to be your personal mentor to help you create your own happily ever after for your business or re-inventing yourself after a life-altering experience.

Filed Under: communications, General, nonfiction writing, Stress, Writing Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Revise Your Work Schedule

May 8, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Do you find yourself rushing at a frenzied pace to begin your day? Do you feel as if you are already an hour behind schedule before you have even finished brushing your teeth? If so, let’s look at at a few simple tricks to help you feel centered and refreshed to begin your day, and ways to reset during the day to keep your inner sense of peace.

Sleep Well:  Do you know how much sleep you need? Perhaps the reason you have a hard time getting up in the morning is because your body needs 7-9 hours of sleep according to current research from the National Research Foundation. Of course, many factors play a role in getting a good night’s rest. But you can create an inviting environment by keeping the lights low (including turning down the red beam from your alarm clock), taking the TV out of the bedroom, going to bed at reasonably the same time  and establishing a consistent bed time ritual.

Write it Down:  Before you go to bed, make a list of your morning activities, and review your calendar for upcoming appointments. Prepare your lunch, make your clothing choices, and gather anything you need to have for the next day (exercise gear, meeting notes, or computer for example).

Take a Break:  Are you able to schedule mini-breaks during the day to be by yourself for 15-minutes or so? Even a 5-minute “oasis of calm” will enhance your sense of well being and reset your inner compass. Close your office door, or go out to your car if you don’t have an office, (last resort lock the bathroom door), set the timer on your phone or computer for 5 or 15 minutes, close your eyes and visit an oasis of calm in your mind. Breathe in the scents and feel the warm sun on your skin. Breathe deeply and exhale slowly. Repeat until the timer goes off. Instead of deep breathing, you may try writing in your journal or other short spurts of creativity. Return to work refreshed and renewed.

Filed Under: Coaxing Creativity Tues Tip, Creativity, Stress, Writing Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

Somebody I used to know…

May 4, 2012 By Leave a Comment

You know how you can have the radio playing in the background and never “tune in” to all the chatter. Suddenly, your ears hone in on a phrase and you can’t get it out of your head. Well, that’s exactly what has happened to me with a song by an Australian artist. The simplicity of the intro notes invite you in and the lyrics keep you engaged. The Belgian-Australian musician, Gotye, sings about a past lover, and the nature of love, but I find myself envisioning looking in the mirror and singing to my reflection.

The image I see resembles somebody that I used to know with glimpses of a brand new me emerging.

Do you ever feel like that?

Who do you see when you look in the mirror?

I look at my reflection and I ask:

Where did the little girl go with her Toni perm curls framing her shy little smile?

Where did the fiercely independent young woman go who could have been a stand-in for Marlo Thomas’s “That Girl” TV character with her perky attitude and brunette flip?

Where did the PTA mom go who volunteered for everything from baking cupcakes to writing the booklet for the fundraising auction and racked up more miles than a Daytona 500 driver as a stay-at-home mom?

Somebody I used to know is reinventing herself.

Yes, strange as it may sound from someone who is receiving AARP solicitations, I am reinventing myself.  I’m reinventing on a daily basis. It’s down right exhausting at times! And it is absolutely exhilarating!

After two breast cancer episodes, two unsuccessful start-up companies, and moving halfway across this continent for gainful employment, I’ve acquired some coping skills to help me in my healing process as well as diffusing my stress level. Whether we are aware of the slow erosion or not, stress takes it’s toll on us on a daily basis. Tapping into my creativity is the way I keep my stress level down. Writing in my journal, playing with beads or paper crafts, and giving myself permission to explore new ways to create…create my own happily ever after.

When I look in the mirror, I see somebody I used to know.

I see that same twinkle in my eye of the mischievous 5-year-old. I see the same grin of the perky young woman embarking on her career as a secretary. I see fingers grasping a pen or flying over a keyboard with words tumbling over each other everywhere, and hear an inquisitive voice asking insightful questions culminating in an amazing body of work.

I’m am no longer the child, young adult, nor the young mother I once was. I see an articulate, compassionate, curious, playful, creative and wise soul. I cherish my past, but I’m even more excited about my future because it is full of wonder and possibility.

When I look in the mirror, I see somebody I want to know.

Who do you see when you look in the mirror?
 I understand what it’s like not to recognize yourself in the mirror because everyone else in your life crowds out your own reflection. That is the reason I created a sanctuary for you. The Unleashed Homemakertm offers you ways to reconnect with the person you want to see in the mirror. Please enter a comment below to let us know we can serve you.
 
Filed Under: communications, Creativity, nonfiction writing, Personal, story, Stress, Writing Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

How do you find your way?

May 4, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Friday Five-Minute Writing Prompt – How do you find your way?

Whatever way you want to answer the query is up to you. Literally, figuratively, or with latitude and longitude coordinates. Are you directionally challenged? Do you pride yourself on being a problem solver? How do you find your way?

Take out a fresh sheet of paper. Natalie Goldberg uses a “fast-writing” pen. I suggest using your favorite writing instrument and an unlined piece of colored paper for fun. I use a fountain pen with purple ink. Some folks opt to use their computer. If that is your preferred method to write, then just open a new word document on your computer and go for it. The point is to keep your fingers moving for five minutes and not stop. I want you to experience how much writing can be accomplished in a short period of time.

If you get stuck, just repeat the writing prompt, or any other phrase that is comfortable for you. Do not stop to edit, correct spelling, look up a better word, or rearrange a sentence. Do not question what comes up in the five minutes: this doesn’t make sense, where did that come from, or what a crazy notion. This is a timed writing exercise so be sure to set the timer on your watch, phone, microwave, computer, or kitchen stove. Whether you use an egg timer, a No. 2 pencil and spiral notebook, your iPad, or even your iPhone, the theory is the same. Keep your hand and/or fingers moving and have fun taking dictation from your unconscious self. Make a list, write a poem, or create a short, short story. This is your time to explore and experiment.

Filed Under: Creativity, Five Minute Writing Prompt, nonfiction writing, story, Uncategorized, Writing Tagged With: , , ,
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